It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
