She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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