Just mADE A PArabola og urine
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
