i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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