I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
