i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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