that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
