Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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