My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
