I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
