I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I'm always down for nudity.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
