Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
