she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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