3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize
