She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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