Got a toothbrush?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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