so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
