can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
