I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
