When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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