Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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