Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
