yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
