His hands were made for my vagina.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
