Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
