Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
