so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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