Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
