i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
