Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
NoShamevember. You game?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
