i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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