Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
