i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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