i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
