please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize