break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
