do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
