I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
