im about as happy as oj after his trial
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
