i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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