OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
