Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
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