I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Randomize
