if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize