you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
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