Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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