we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
