We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
We had to coat check the pizza.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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