that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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