we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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