i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
